Bored feeling of wanting out!

   I feel like writing. Its been a long time. I guess this will be one that i write about myself. To many things in my mind but that is every day with me. I deal with loneliness a lot lately.  All my very close friends live out of state. So i try to leave alot. Well visit other places. Money is kind of tight but i do save up for these trips mostly.
   I never felt i belonged here in Alabama. Me and this place do not fit at all. I hate football and everything about it. Pretty much treated like an outcast to most people here become of that fact. I think that is sad and sick and stupid. At least that how people judge me becomes of that. It i feel like if i don't think or like what everyone else does then i shit to them all. Trust me i don't fall for it. I don't want to like or be like anyone by who i am.
   I know i not a bad person. I am to nice sometimes. At work i am not so nice i rather people just leave me the fuck alone. For the most part people do leave me alone. I will try to explain when people ask me how i am doing i rather say nothing at all.  But i seem to give a smart ass answer like I don't know i haven't thought about it. That seem to shut people up most don't know what to say to that. Which i guess is my point. I just want  to do my job and go home. Well you also got to understand there is to much drama at work. Everything you say the whole building will pretty know but the end of the day if not sooner. I stay out of that shit. So yeah i am alone at work.
    My A.D.D. been pretty bad lately at least that what i think it is, i must of started 3 movies and shows yesterday and still really couldn't just sit and watch one all the way through. I am like what the hell is wrong with me. I am antsy. I feel like i want out but at the same time i don't. Listen to music is pretty much the only thing i can do everyday. It still sometime the only thing that can put me in a good mood.
   I still want out though mostly out of this state. But not sure how to do that yet. I got some debt trying to pay off before i can even think about doing that. I really don't get out much anymore but to work. I go to therapy once a week though . I don't go to my NA meetings no more right now. Long story to much click high school evil bullshit mostly is the reason why. And honestly i have not thought about using or drinking in years. Shit you could even though it in my face and i would not think of using it.
  Not sure why i am writing this. I guess mostly for myself i don't really think anyone really read my shit anyway. of course its been a long time sense i wrote anything. Mostly my typos have gotten really bad i hate it. My spelling has always been bad but the typos are very bad lately. I guessing i am writing to find some type of connection to myself somewhere i don't know. I don't even know if i am making any sense either.
   Like my tittle of this blog I am just a boy with silly dreams. Well i will be a year older this Thursday i don't look forward tot hat no more. It not like i am going to have a party or anyone going to through  one for me or anything. Or invite me out or anything that.  I will just go to therapy that day and do nothing like i always do.
   I am bored all the time now. Looking forward to going to Ohio at the beginning of June though counting down the days to get out of this place for a little while. Well i guess i will stop before i start to repeat myself.
  oh i started watching American Horror Story very cool show i think so. I only seen the first 3 episodes very cool i like it. Well i'll shut up now.

My review of Skinny Puppy's new album hanDover

Skinny Puppy-hanDover

SPV GmbH

Skinny Puppy happens to be one of my most favorite non metal bands out there! With that being said Skinny Puppy does not disappoint me at all with their new album hanDover. Skinny Puppy still shows on this album they are still one of the best industrial bands out there!! The lyrics on this album are emotional and awesome.

Now I have liked and love every Skinny Puppy release to date. This being their third album sents getting back together in 2003 with newest member Mark Walk but its Skinny Puppy's 12^th studio release. The full line up is cEven Key, Nivek Ogre, and Mark Walk. Mark Walk is also a member of Nivek Ogre's solo project Ohgr which he is awesome there as well.

Now a little info on why there is a long gap why this album too a long time to release. Their last album Mythmaker came out in 2007. Skinny Puppy started working on a new album in 2008 and finish one and turn it into their lable SPV GmbH. But SPV ran into insolvency  problems and the album's fate became uncertain. But Skinny Puppy toured in 2009 anyway. In a interview Ogre saying handing over the album to SPV with all those problem is where the name of this album comes from. And the album hanDover has some of those tracks they turned with new tracks as well so it not the same album they turned in. They still under contract with SPV to release an album so this is way it sounds like they are still with SPV.

Now out of the Skinny Puppy albums that have come out sents 2003 hanDover is my favorite. But love the other albums too. Every song on hanDover is just awesome! One of my favorite songs on the album called AshAs they wrote this song for a good friend and live crew member of theirs that died. His name was Sasha Coon. The title is an anagram of his name. Very emotional song. You can hear it Ogre's voice. The song is sad but moving as well. I would say a great song to dedicate their friends memory.

Also little more info. Interviews I read with Skinny Puppy about hanDover some people thought maybe they were talking about the OCCUPY group on this album. One thing about Skinny Puppy their lyrics and subject matter for their albums always seem to be a head of its time. But in fact they were not talking about OCCUPY group they were in fact talking about the problems in the music industry.

cEven Key as always is drums, guitar, bass, keyboards, synths, theremin, electronics. Just amazing sounds he comes up with all that on this album . Now Mark Walk is guitar, bass, keyboards, synths and Ogre is of course vocals and synths as well.

Another one of my favorite songs on this album is Village. Just a lot of power ion this song. You can hear the emotion in Ogre's voice I would say a but on the angry said with his vocal style and yelling screams. They just fit perfectly with this song.

The other tracks are great as well. The track called “Brownstone” is a person Ogre claims that is real in interviews. The track “Ovirt” is the first track on hanDover a great opener to the album. Sets it up very well. In the song “Cullorblind” I love the music with Ogre's spoken word in harmony rhythm style like singing just set the song up nicely. “Wavy” has really cool guitar into merging into the other synths and electronics sounds. Kind like a dreamy like sound to it. “Gambatte” Has awesome rhythm and beat to the flow is just great with Ogre's voice and cEven and Mark's work as well. Drum tracks on this song are great a song I like to be moving to. “Icktums” Starts off with dreaming synths sounds into fast beats and noise rhythm. “Point” starts off with just crazy awesome noise with Ogre's voice mixed into it. I love how all these songs just change up. You have to hear each song all the way through to get the full effect.”Vyrisus” again great beats and rhythm I know I said that pretty much about every song but it true Skinny Puppy is just that awesome on this album.

Now the last track on this album called NoiseX and it is just that and it great. Cause it straight up Skinny Puppy brap. Those that don't know what Brap is. Skinny Puppy made the term up. It means getting together getting high hook up electronic equipment and just jam. They also known to do this live as well.

Yes I said a lot but it just a great album. Skinny Puppy still shows how industrial music should be made. This album has been rake the best electronic industrial albums of 2011 and I so agree. Go get it for sure if this is your kind of music. And Skinny Puppy BRAP ON GUYS!!!!